


Don't Move

by Valaxiom



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fill-in-the-backstory, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mei is super gay for Zarya, Missing Scene, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Team Dynamics, and vice versa, please let my satanic snowball daughter be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-11
Updated: 2016-08-11
Packaged: 2018-08-08 02:10:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7739416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valaxiom/pseuds/Valaxiom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After rejoining the revived Overwatch, Mei has a tough time letting go of her past. It's hard to live in the moment when your brain can barely comprehend what it's gone through. Rated T only for somewhat-graphic flashbacks, no smut.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Move

**Author's Note:**

> I swear to god, this was meant to be a short fluffy piece full of Mei/Zarya cuddles, but I got carried away with the angst. Enjoy your adorable fluff with a delicate salting of fresh tears.

Mei-ling Zhou had always hated being cold. Even as a child, when she’d vaguely preferred winter to summer- the colours were more muted and easier to take in, and she’d been shy about showing skin- the icy chill of winter had been horrible. Teased by the other kids for being slightly pudgy, Mei had been relieved whenever autumn began and she was able to wear her comfortably baggy clothes once more. That comfort vanished by the time the first snow showed up. The cold had been all-consuming in the tiny apartment Mei had grown up in. Their heater had been a rickety old electric model, and it barely warmed the space it occupied, let alone the entire apartment. Mei had many memories of winter evenings spent falling asleep in front of the heater while wrapped in a cocoon of blankets.

Getting assigned to Overwatch’s Antarctic Base had been a blessing and a curse. A blessing, because she was finally out of the city she’d grown up in, finally able to see her future clearly ahead of her. Overwatch had accepted her application into its newly-founded climate science corps with gratifying swiftness, and Mei had been so overwhelmed by the sudden occurrence of the best-case scenario for her life becoming fact that she hadn’t really considered the base she was destined for. Basic training had been a whirlwind of new information and reviews, leaving the young Chinese woman barely any time to think ahead in order to ponder the Climate Monitoring station’s location.

Sure, she knew that Antarctica was cold- she was a climatologist after all, and not an idiot. But her willingness to prove herself to the organization allowed her to put those basic facts into the back of her mind, with the result that, when she stepped off the plane to meet her new team, Mei literally froze. There were tiny icicles forming on her gloves by the time she and her escort made it from the plane to the well-heated base. Watchpoint: Antarctica’s average daily temperature was around negative twenty degrees Celsius. Nonetheless, for the duration of her team’s stay, Mei was determined to grit her teeth and deal with the cold.

And then there was a blizzard. The storm would have been a once-in-a-century occurrence before the uniformly-unusual weather of the last century, with massive drifts of heavy ice and snow being dumped on the base. Communications were cut after their cell tower was literally buried in snow. The strong winds prevented any aircraft from reaching the base to retrieve the scientists, and for the team to try to escape the base on foot would have been suicide. Isolated and away from the coast in the mountains, they could do nothing but wait out the storm and try to keep warm. The team was nervous, but not terrified; after all, in the twenty first century, no one died because of a lack of power. They had backups for their backups, and even if everything did crash, the storm couldn’t last forever. Overwatch would send a rescue for them.

The main generator died, buried in a tomb of snow. There was no word from Overwatch.  

They got more nervous. Mei found herself taking stock of their food supplies, and was struck by how little they actually had. The base had been accustomed to weekly supply drops, and there had never been enough space or necessity to store extra food. By this point, the storm had been going on for almost four days without stop, and showed no signs of slowing down. There had been no communication with the outside world. Their last supply drop had been ten days ago, and by Mei’s calculations, even with severe rationing for the entire team, there was only enough food left for another week or so.

On the sixth day, the backup generator died.

All non-essential tasks for the base were shut down to conserve power. The base became noticeably colder, and Mei couldn’t stop shivering. She hated the cold- it was inescapable and patient. This storm was breaking records, but Mei couldn’t really find it within herself to care. They had one more generator for the base, but it was powered by gas, and had an extremely limited usage time. If they were lucky, it would last another three days.

The generator made it until halfway through their ninth day of cowering from the snowstorm, and then the lights started to flicker. Out of desperation, the team leader presented the group with an option that was likely to fail; they would freeze themselves until help arrived. Cryogenics were dangerous. The odds of survival were very low, even under the best circumstances. These were not the best circumstances. The only tools at their disposal were the endothermic diffusers that had been intended for samples and deceased wildlife. The technology had not been tested extensively on humans.

Mei didn’t want to freeze, but she also didn’t want to die. There was still so much she wanted to do, and the planet hadn’t been saved yet. But with all the base’s power sources gone, it would be a matter of days until they all froze to death. Their food supplies were also low- Mei had calculated that they had enough left for perhaps another two days. With the storm showing no sign of stopping, cryostasis was the only option left.

The cryogenics chamber at the heart of the base resembled a giant, sterile refrigerator. The pods that had been meant for scientific samples were now hastily altered to fit the scientists themselves. Mei was terrified. The other agents were all coping in their own ways- Jones had gone blank, Caret was having a panic attack, Kowalski and Andersen wouldn’t stop crying- and Mei-ling Zhou felt like she was going completely numb. The terror was simply too much to deal with. The last thing she saw after stepping into the chamber was their team leader’s tearful face as they shut her escape to the frigid world. There was a hiss and the sudden jab of a sedative before the world went completely dark.

***

It stayed dark for a long time.

***

When Mei was finally woken up from the cryostasis, she didn’t feel like she’d really thawed at all. Everything felt distant- the world was even more of a mess than it had been when she’d disappeared from time for years. The rest of her team was dead, having perished in those tiny chambers during the long, dark years between their self-induced freezing and their recovery. Overwatch was dead and gone- it had been a random discovery by Winston that had uncovered her. Mei almost had to laugh at the timing. While she and her team had been fighting to survive a polar storm, the rest of Overwatch had been fighting to survive a coup, then the forced disbandment by the United Nations. Their desperate pleas for help had gone unnoticed and unanswered because there had been no one left to answer the phone.

Mei was bitter, of course. Who wouldn’t be? Thanks to a bunch of selfish politicians and power-hungry fools, she and her team had been left to die in the wilderness. They had been forgotten by the world because everyone had simply assumed that they had died quietly in the snow.

The nightmares were the worst part.

Mei still dreamed of suffocating beneath a mountain of white, of breathing in only to feel frost caking her throat, of the tiny shards of ice like needles against her skin-

She hadn’t seen the bodies of her teammates. Once again, Mei was dealt a hand that contained both mercies and curses. A mercy, because she could remember them the way they’d been while alive, happy, laughing, and determined. A curse, because her imagination created ghoulish figures that only vaguely recalled the people she’d worked with for months to try to save the world. They followed her through ice-stricken corridors and told her that if she’d just been smarter, stronger, better, she would have been able to save them.

A blue-and-purple frostbitten version of Jones told her that he’d died in the first week- his chamber had failed because of a poorly-locked section on the door. Not her fault, she knew (as the therapist had told her), but she still had to listen to him scream.

Andersen had part of her face missing due to the scavengers that had managed to access her chamber. Mei knew, logically, that the cryogenics chamber had been inaccessible to outside wildlife. Mei’s subconscious, on the other hand, was convinced that animals had gotten in.

 “I had a wife and teenaged son,” Kowalski said mournfully. His blond hair was turned white by snow. “I’ll never get to see him graduate.” (Mei had looked up his son after being defrosted. The boy had graduated, with honours, and gone on to become a theoretical climate physicist in Warsaw. Mei had cried.)

“Why are you alive, when the rest of us died?” hissed nightmare-Caret. She’d loved strawberries. Mei might have been a little in love with her.

In her dream, she stood there while her former teammates and friends hurled reproaches and snow at her. She was gradually buried beneath their insults and tears and questions. Mei

f

r

o

z

e.

 

When she woke up in the middle of the night, soaked in freezing sweat and alone in her room, she couldn’t do anything. She was so cold, even though it was spring in Gibraltar. Mei had a fear that the cold wasn’t something that would ever leave her, that it was something that went deeper than bones and muscle.

Mei couldn’t go back to sleep, not after that doozy of a dream. She wrapped herself in her comforter over top of her thick pajamas and shuffled down the hall to the common room. Perhaps she’d make herself some tea and catch up on the week’s latest scientific news. To her surprise, the common room was already occupied.

Zarya was slumped across the common room’s comfiest couch beneath a massive quilt and avidly watching Star Wars: A New Hope. The volume was low, but Mei was able to catch the sound of starship engines firing and Harrison Ford yelling. Zarya looked up and jumped a little bit when she saw Mei in the doorway.

“Mei? What are you doing awake at this hour?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” said Mei.

“I always wake up too early. I fall asleep around eight or nine, then wake up around four.” The Russian woman shrugged. “It is unusual, but I have gotten used to it. You, however, are not normally awake at this hour.”

Mei bit her lip. She and Zarya hadn’t chatted much, but she did like the other woman. She was always warm towards Mei and the other agents, even if she was a bit vocal with her dislike towards Omnics. Although, given her history, the animosity she sported was somewhat understandable.

At Zarya’s expectant look, she caved. “I couldn’t sleep. I keep having bad dreams, and I don’t really want to go back to bed.”

“Ahh. I understand. About the ice, yes?”

Mei nodded. She didn’t want to talk about it any more, so it was a relief when Zarya patted the spot next to her on the couch and said, “Come watch this silly movie about wars in the stars with me. Harrison Ford reminds me of McCree, what do you think?”

Mei chuckled as she burrowed next to Zarya on the couch. The other woman shifted a bit to make room, and there was a warm spot which Mei quickly capitalized on. Zarya yelped a bit when Mei accidentally let one of her feet come near the other’s leg.

“Brrr, you’re freezing! Here, you can share my blanket. There is lots of space, do not be shy.”

Mei let herself lean against Zarya’s side. The other woman was built sturdy and solid, but she emanated warmth like a furnace. Mei snuggled in and watched the movie quietly, sometimes giggling at Zarya’s running commentary. When it was over, the next one started automatically, and Mei was relieved because that meant that Zarya wouldn’t be moving away. They had been sitting together for a while when Zarya casually let one arm fall across Mei. Mei had been starting to feel a bit sleepy again, but affectionately leaned against the other woman, quietly pleased at the contact. The last time she’d been this close to another human being had probably been before being stationed at the Watchpoint. Her thoughts shied away from that line of  thought and she let them, forcing herself to focus on the present. In the movie, the hero’s valiant friends had been captured by the bad guys. The man who sounded like McCree was being tortured. Mei was half-paying attention to the movie, and half-paying attention to the way Zarya had begun to play with her hair, when carbon freezing was mentioned.

Mei stiffened and Zarya noticed immediately. 

“Mei? What is wrong?”

“N-nothing. Nothing. I’m fine, honestly.”

Zarya frowned, but kept fiddling with her hair. Mei felt herself start to relax again... until Han Solo’s pained visage, frozen in carbonite, was shown. Mei froze. She imagined that the faces of her companions, after they’d been pried out of their icy coffins, had been similar to this character’s. She didn’t realize she was hyperventilating until Zarya was sitting her upright, the Russian’s massive hands gently holding her shoulders.

“Breathe with me. One, two, one, two. In, and then out. In, and then out. Good. You are Mei-ling Zhou. You are safe. You are at Watchpoint: Gibraltar. It is currently four forty-seven in the morning. You were watching a movie with me because you could not sleep. My name is Aleksandra Zaryanova, or Zarya. You were sitting with me because you were cold and because I think that you are cute. I’ve got you. You are safe.”

Mei’s stuttering breaths eventually died down, replaced with quiet noises of distress. Zarya held her until she went quiet. The movie had continued on in the background, and now the credits were rolling.

“T-thank you, I’m so sorry-“ Mei felt like crying again, she’d gotten emotional over a silly scene in a movie she’d seen dozens of times as a child.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, my friend. Would you like to keep watching these movies, or should I find a different series?”

Mei sniffled a bit. Zarya’s arm tightened around her protectively. “No, Star Wars is fine. I like the next one the best anyway- the good guys win, and they save the planets.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Besides, I want to see the movie-McCree escape the carbon.” Mei settled in next to the larger woman, bundling them both in blankets.

“Ahh. I see. Argh, your feet are still so cold!”

“Zarya... when you were talking to me earlier, when I was panicking... did you mean what you said?”

“About what?”

“About me being cute?”

“Yes.”

“Oh. I think you’re cute too.”

Zarya hugged her. It was like being embraced by a big fuzzy Siberian bear, and Mei didn’t feel cold for the first time in years.

When the rest of the team started waking up, they found Zarya and Mei both sound asleep on the couch and tangled in a massive nest of blankets, quilts, and pillows together. Zarya was snoring quietly with Mei at her side.

Hana passed Lucio ten bucks.

“You were right, they do look very cute together. Now, any takers on how long until they start publicly dating?”


End file.
